The Art of feeling Stupid and other Auditions

               So the other day I auditioned   for a movie. This is the year of branching out for me so I am really happy to try out new things. I’ve never been in a movie before and would love to star in a Nigerian film. So since I live in Kenya I figured I’d begin here at home.

People in Kenya know me as the mean Sakata judge so when people see me coming in for an audition they automatically assume that I’ll get the part. Perhaps they think, “Since she can judge dance perhaps she knows how to act as well.” Or perhaps they think I’m acting on television. Maybe. Maybe not. Perhaps they think that I’m friends with the director.  Either way the truth is that I hate auditions and feel pretty stupid acting in front of only a couple of people who will ultimately decide my acting career fate.

            Perhaps this is how contestants feel when they stand before me to dance. The difference is that not only are the crews dancing for me, they are on national television as well so in essence they are dancing for the world.

There I was in front of a lone camera, with my hands stretched out in front of me in midair, hands clasped tightly together, breathing heavily, eyes bulging; my best impression of a maniac about to shoot someone.

I felt stupid. I felt awkward. Yet the adrenaline was rushing through my veins and I felt within myself that I did well. I hope that I’ll get the part. I believe I will…but until then I’ll keep auditioning and whether or not I feel stupid or awkward it’s ok because maybe, just maybe someone who gets onto the stage to dance in front of me feels the exact same way.